“Don’t be scared of hanging out of the helicopter to get a better shot, you’ll have a harness.” Shouted the adept pilot over the whipping blades above us.
“You mean this?” I held up a floppy black seatbelt, looking no more secure than the belts in the old jetta I hoped to blow up.
Well, here we go. I shrugged my shoulders internally, and locked into go mode. There wasn’t a choice of whether I would accomplish the shot or not, there was simply shooting. It didn’t matter that this was the second time I’d been up in a helicopter in my entire life, the first being a tour over the Grand Canyon with my mom and dad when I was just a tiny Weiss. It didn’t matter that in order to get a good shot on the car, I had to hang my body and my left leg out of the door, high above the solid ground. It didn’t matter that a bunch of people below were watching me from a safe distance, waiting for the outcome. It didn’t matter that my hands first touched the FN SCAR rifle only 45 minutes before, or that in order to blow up the car I had to hit a strike plate on top of it about the size of a dinner plate — at 150+ yards — in a bouncing helicopter. It didn’t matter that worry filled the helicopter pilot’s eyes as he asked, “You’re gonna use a scope?” and when I nodded my head yes, he said, “well, that’s going to make it a lot harder.”
No. None of that mattered. Correction. None of that could matter. That’s all clutter in the mind, distracting from the shot. All that matters is the shot itself. The gun in my shoulder, aiming, the recoil, the follow through.
Same thing in life. We have so much clutter filling our minds if we let it. Worry of what could have been, what we should have done, what we should’ve said, or what we wished we had known. Then we bounce over to the future. We worry about how all the things we think could’ve been better, might mess up our future moments — or worse — our whole life path.
STOP.
Focus, my friend.
Center on this moment. Play the cards that are dealt, and play them the best you can. That’s all you have control over. Keep your thoughts wrapped in the task at hand, with the tools in hand.
Give yourself grace.
Back in the ‘copter, for a split second my mind rushed as I saw how tiny the car actually looked from way above, and the fact that the roof was my only target. The explosives technician rigged the roof with a strike plate. Hit it and it would blow. My scope picture danced and bounced all around the target, subject to the movement of the ‘copter. It was like being in rough and stormy seas and trying to keep your eye on a tiny life preserver in the distance flowing in and out of the frothing waves.
And then. Everything quieted.
Be it determination or a tiny clearing amongst the clouds of the mind, in that moment none of the challenges surrounding me mattered. I sent a shot, and in that split second as the flames began billowing around the Jetta from the first shot, I didn’t believe it. How could I possibly have gotten a shot like that off on the first shot? Before the flames reached their half way point or the success registered fully, my second shot spend through the bubbling fire as the black smoke greeted the azure sky.
Now, my friend, that whole video shoot was a learning experience. Usually I do things on my own (as you can probably tell). There were many more players for this one. So many things could’ve gone wrong, and did go wrong. Just one example, the MK116 rifle arrived for the first time in my grip shortly before I shot the RC car. I didn’t have a way to sight it in properly, so I had to aim a foot above the twirling little bugger, to even hit it. This of course meant my sites obscured the view of the RC. But, I didn’t have a choice. Correction. I didn’t allow myself a choice. Alternative choices to what you really want, contributes to more mind clutter. I simply had to work with what I was given for those moments, and not fret about the outcome.
There’s always a good possibility we will fail. We’re human. But we don’t actually fail if we max out the potential of the moment we have, and the tools we’re given for it. What’s happened and what will happen, is not in our control. Let that sink in.
Outcome is not in our control.
Give up control of the moments surrounding the moment you grasp now, Sharp Shots. You may fail, but you may succeed. Forget the outcome. All that matters is this present moment. Work with what you’ve got starting right… …
…NOW.
And now I want to hear from you. Have you ever experienced being surrounded by events you couldn’t control, but so much rested on the outcome? What did you learn and how did you deal?
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Kirsten, your fb blurb ends with “How do you stay focused in the moment, in spite of the pressure?” I immediately recalled my standard zen trick – taking an easy, gracious breath, to the zero-point where it stops – and then letting the comfy exhale clear my consciousness with peaceful focus, into the calm moment. Soon I saw your description of your turning-point: “And then. Everything quieted. Be it determination or a tiny clearing amongst the clouds of the mind, in that moment none of the challenges surrounding me mattered.” (Even your punctuation adds to the quality of that description.) Kirsten, I’m pretty sure you DID something in that moment, something you didn’t mention, something you’re so trained to do, you might hardly notice. As you said, you just had to go ahead and do it – no choice. Was that not the moment when you took in the shooter’s breath and stopped and let it out gently? You’ve been focusing your mind that way since the first time someone told you how to shoot. I think your story shows how well that natural trick works – yes in the plain silent calm of shooting a pencil-eraser you can’t see, but yes also in the maddest conditions. In the center of every mental, social, physical hurricane there is the pure calm of the moment; we need only to bring that calm along as we step through the storm. The clarifying shooter’s breath is the trick that works in all situations. And Kirsten, standard lavish fb praise aside, your writing is awesome. I’m a writer: I hate being told I write well. Like you, I’m just struggling to get the darn point across. That mundane, disciplined focus is what clears the writer’s mind, the pragmatic secret of “great writing.” And you sure got the point across! Some people spend decades in Zen practice, trying for the “spiritual” wisdom you’ve acquired by focusing your mind for The Shot. Now, let me add that your particular way of living allows you some uncannily clear moments, which might seem like unusual luck. The ancient metaphor holds that you have shown valor enough to please the gods of war, so they serve you when it counts. No one who does not experience this can know about it.
Well said, I’ve integrated my Zen practice into shooting for years and teach it to my rifle team!
So. Beautiful. Beautifully written and beautiful shots. Thank you!
Hi Kirsten,
First of all you’re so beautiful and a joy to work with. I took some pictures of you at this shoot and what a pleasure to do….. It was fun watching you in action! I would love to send you the photos I took of you so please email me back. Looking forward to hear from you… Thanks!!
Trying to wrap my head around it. back of the envelope calculation says that Kirsten had approx 0.4×0.4 degrees leeway to hit the roof. and it looks like she is compensating for the helicopter rolling more than that. I think the “Luke Skywalker blows up Death Star” comparison would be accurate in that the protagonist hits a target under seemingly impossible conditions on the first try. Luke had the Force (and multiple retakes and CGI graphics). Kirsten had…focus and determination. It matters not what you call it, I guess.
The feeling of loss of control is universally stressful. There seems to me to be two types: in the first, I have already done everything, and must wait for the the test results to come back, or the company to give me the job offer, or dad to finish surgery. In this case, I must try to focus on something else, spend time with close friends and family, and not sabotage the previous progress.
Second, I am attempting some seemingly impossible feat, and nobody can help except by cheering me on. In this case I can only be knowledgeable to choose the approach most likely to yield a good result, and well practiced to succeed in the execution. In the heat of the moment, I tell myself that my sympathetic nervous system is stimulated to give me energy to accomplish this feat and to direct the rush of energy into focusing on the task at hand. Relaxation is the key, which can be achieved by Zen. and if that’s not enough, there’s propranolol, citalopram, and diazepam.
Well said Jo, and its interesting to see your perspective through the eyes of an epic story most of us appreciate. Also…I prefer Zen over drugs haha 😉
KJW is a total class act. Terrific video. Wake up Hollywood, KJW is the star you have been searching for…